This "Blogger" is completely new to me. I'm not sure what I will write, how often I will write or where this will evolve into but, that is the beauty of the journey, isn't it? So...here I go.
"Sometimes you just have to jump out of the window and grow wings on the way down"
~Ray Bradbury
I have had a need lately to... express myself. To be heard. To be understood? Although, Im not sure to whom exactly I want to hear or understand.
"Asking all kinds of questions, to myself, but never finding the answers. Crying at the top of my voice, and no one listening. All this time, I still remember everything you said. There's so much you promised, how could I ever forget"
~Genesis
What causes a man to destroy and devastate another human being with out provocation? With out reason or cause? ...just to inflict pain and suffering. Knowingly. Purposefully. Skillfully and with out hesitation. ...knowing that person will suffer greatly and that man does nothing to stop himself and does nothing to ease the pain he knows he is responsible for inflicting upon them. What kind of human being does this to another human being, and then just sits idly by and watches the suffering?
It is a human with no conscience. With no soul left inside of himself to tell him that he was once human himself. No soul to remind him of the pain he once suffered at the hands of another when he was innocent himself.
...you see, I fell deeply, honestly and completely in love with a man who promised to "always be there for me. Always" and wanted to get married and grow old together. We had our life planned out. Where and how we would live, children, lifestyle, you name it we had it figured out. We were soul mates. "Perfect for each other" as I was told every single day. And there was no shortage of the expression of love and communication on a daily basis. This man was everything my heart had ever dreamed of or desired. And he was thankful and told me everyday that "I have finally found you! You are The One!" ...sigh. Then one day, the day after he had just told me again, how perfect I was for him and that I was definitely... The One... I never heard from him again.
My heart is shattered. The pain is... immeasurable.
All of my attempts to communicate or make contact have all gone unanswered. Unacknowledged. Un-addressed completely. Until one day, several weeks later, I received several messages filled with hate and annoyance from him, yet still with no explanation to what has happened. I have no idea what has happened and he will not speak with me.
"The truth hurts but, silence kills."
